tour de france drinking game:

Let's all celebrate the Tour de France by getting properly fucked up in its honour!!!

Feel free to add your own rules on the wall...


Take a drink...


1. Whenever you see the green, white or polka dot jersey

2. Everytime you see Cadel Evans' chin

3. Every time there is a close up of someones crotch

4. Every time the commentator pronounces Team Liquigas as Team “Leaky Gas”

5. Every time there is a helicopter shot of some French chateau, castle or monument

6. Every time the commentators make a remark about how beautiful the countryside is

7. Every time the commentators apologise for the picture quality and/or blame trees, tunnels or the weather as the reason.

8. Every time Phil or Paul struggle to pronounce a French or Italian name

9. Every time a rider is refered to by their nickname such as Thor Hushovd the “God of Thunder”

10. Every time the commentators misidentify a rider

11. Every time the commentators use the word “precarious”

12. Every time the commentators mention Bastille Day

13. Every time the commentators describe a rider as “flying the flag”

14. Whenever a rider/group of rider passes under a particular km banner.

15. Whenever Alpe D'Huez is mentioned

16, Everytime Phil Liggett and Paul Sherwen mention "the front end of the main field"

17. Every time they refer to to all the leaders as being "present and correct"

18. Whenever the commentators mention a rider completing the previous stage with some body part broken, dislocated or punctured.

19. When Paul or Phil warn of the potential carnage that could occur on a tight corner on a narrow street, or wet cobblestones, when coming into a town.

20. Whenever Phil and Paul refer to potential obstacles as traffic "furniture"


Drink whenever the following lines are mentioned by the commentators:


1. “dancing on those pedals”

2. “his face is a picture of pain”

3. “he's digging into that suitcase of courage”

4. “he's having the ride of his life”

5. “It's going to be a long day in the saddle today”

6. “turning the pedal in ANGER”

7. “the elastic has snapped”

8. “riding like a man possessed”

9. “he's got the bit between his teeth”



All drinks/shots must be downed when...


1. The leader/peloton cross the summit of a climb.

2. Every time Mark Cavendish is referred to as the “fastest thing on two wheels” or the “Manx Missile”

3. Every time the Col du Tormulet is mentioned

4. Every time the commentators mention the “autobus”

5. When Phil says that once you pull on the yellow jersey you become two men

6. Every time a helicopter shot is shown of some inspired agricultural displays such as giant bicycles made of crops

7. Every time Lance Armstrong is mentioned